A CX-Mas Carol

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Maaike “Can’t Dutch This” Everts and Kim “Psychlo” Cross
Maaike “Can’t Dutch This” Everts and Kim “Psychlo” Cross

Maaike “Can’t Dutch This” Everts and Kim “Psychlo” Cross

In honor of the last BAMACROSS race of the 2012 season, here’s a little song about our own winter wonderland. Wishing you a very merry CX-mas and a season of holiday jeers.
—Kim

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Cow bells ring, are you listening?
On the course mud is glistening
The Beer Fairy’s here
To torment and jeer
Riding in a muddy wonderland

Gone away is the sunshine
Here to stay: beer and moonshine
Deep in the pain cave
you try to look brave
Riding in a muddy wonderland

In the sand pit you can do an endo
And pretend that you don’t hear the crowd
Heckling quickly reaches a crescendo
Damn, that vuvuzela’s awful loud!

Later on, as you pedal
With no hopes of a medal
You’re breathless and tapped
And then you get lapped
Riding in a muddy wonderland

You regret having taken
That last hand-up of bacon
You vurp in your mouth
Your race has gone South
Riding in a muddy wonderland

Cyclo-cross is more or less “bike NASCAR”
Racers shave their legs but not their face
Riding bikes that cost more than their wife’s car
Anything to try to up the pace

When it’s done, we’re all stinking
No one cares, ‘cause we’re drinking
A party, a race—all in the same place
Riding in a muddy wonderland

By Kim Cross – Birmingham, AL – reposted from Spokes-woman.com